back in the bed

i lie
down and stare
at the ceiling
in my head
operating on
my feelings
light bleeds
from the windows
tracing figures on the walls
how the fuck
how the fuck
did i end up
back in this bed again
i'm sinking
in the duvet
it welcomes me
like a predator
every night
so i lie
so i die
to be born
again and again
every morning
i love it
i fucking love it (so much)
i'm choking
laughing, joking
but i can't just fucking quit

---
sleep? fuck sleep!

#1